Glick's New Year's Resolutions

by Dustin Glick

1. Get a better job in an office with a legal amount of asbestos in the air
2. Try not to cry every day, or at least wait until after lunch
3. Stop obsessing over imminent decline of man
4. Sell out
5. Beat up a hipster
6. Find reason to live
7. Smell Play-Doh more often
8. Cut Internet usage down to 14 hours a day
9. Buy iPod and bury discman in backyard
10. Stop aging

(Image from Francisquini's flickr.)